Your Experiences Shape You, But They Don’t Define You: How the stories we tell ourselves either set us free or hold us back
May 4, 2026
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Life has a way of handing us moments we never asked for. Breakups in our teenage years, a loss on the football field we poured everything into, conflicts with people we love, or setbacks in work we’ve built with our own hands. I’ve lived all of those. And if you’re honest with yourself, you probably have too.
We all want to be known as capable, good at what we do, and worthy of respect and love. Sometimes we try to define ourselves by our strengths. Men, in particular, often anchor their identity to their careers. But perhaps even more common, and more damaging, is how many of us define ourselves by our failures and the painful things that have happened to us.
