January is a perfect time to reflect on the past year and reassess your goals for the year ahead as a couple. Some years are filled with joy and ease, while others require persistence and growth through challenges. Regardless of the season, as Christians, we have the ability to overcome habits and actions that no longer serve us and embrace new behaviors that lead to a flourishing relationship.
How to Start a Goal-Setting Marriage Meeting
Before diving into goal setting for the new year, I recommend holding a marriage meeting—a purposeful time to connect and reflect (and a great excuse for a date night!). Make sure this time is dedicated to just the two of you, without distractions from the kiddos or other responsibilities. Consider having this conversation over dinner, using photos from the past year to jog your memory and spark discussion. Use this time to connect, laugh, and enjoy memories made throughout the past year. Remind each other how much each of you matters to one another and affirm that you are a team and want the best for your family in the coming year.
For more tips on having meaningful conversations as a couple, check out our article that gives you 2 Communication Techniques for Couples.
Key Questions to Guide Your Reflection
Your discussion can vary depending on how the past year unfolded, but here are some questions to get you started:
- What were some highlights and challenges of the past year?
- What areas of our relationship could use improvement?
- What was the most memorable moment we shared last year?
- Were there any disappointments or unmet expectations?
- What do you hope for in the coming year?
- Are there issues that have been overlooked but need attention?
- What are one or two things we want to accomplish together that didn’t happen last year?
Collaborative Goal Setting for 2025
Once you have a solid overview of your marriage, family life, and what did or didn’t work, it’s time to focus on goal setting. These goals should reflect what you want to achieve together for your marriage. Common areas to consider include communication, intimacy (physical, emotional, and spiritual), finances, and parenting.
Write It Down: Research shows that writing down your goals makes you significantly more likely to achieve them. So grab a notebook, an index card, or even your phone (though there is some evidence that paper and pencil are much better methods to keeping your goals). Place your goals somewhere visible—by the kitchen sink, on your nightstand, or even taped to the fridge.
Integrating Faith into Your Goals
Faith can be a powerful part of your goal-setting journey. Reflect on how you and your spouse pray together. Do you have a routine? Establishing routines can provide stability and focus, especially during chaotic times. If you don’t pray together, maybe it is time to start. Prayer helps each of you learn what is meaningful to the other person, their desires, their fears, and more. It can really help you draw close and understand each other better. We tend to share with God things that we may not share with one another. The goal of prayer is to lead with a focus on who and what is most important: God.
Find a Bible Verse: Consider finding a Bible verse that resonates with your goals as a couple. Display it somewhere meaningful, like near the remote control or on your bathroom mirror, to serve as a constant reminder of your shared vision. Examples might include:
- “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9)
- “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
Building Habits for Long-Term Success
Achieving big goals often comes down to small, consistent daily habits. Once you’ve identified your big-picture goals for 2025, work backward to determine the daily actions needed to get there. For example:
- Want to improve communication? Schedule daily 10-minute check-ins.
- Hoping to grow spiritually? Commit to praying together every evening.
- Looking to enhance intimacy? Plan a weekly date night.
To explore more practical tips that relate to habits, read How Habits Help Us, Hurt Us, and Hurt the People We Love.
When You Need Extra Support
The road to achieving goals can be bumpy, and it’s okay to seek support when needed. Sometimes, an outside perspective from a professional can provide clarity and strategies to help you overcome obstacles. If you need guidance or encouragement as you work toward your goals, reach out to us—we’d love to support you on this journey.
Take the First Step Today
Remember, marriage takes intentional effort. With faith, routines, and a shared commitment to growth, you can create a stronger, more fulfilling partnership in the year ahead. Start small, stay consistent, and celebrate your progress along the way. Let’s make 2025 a year of renewed hope and stronger connections!
Author:
Nicole Waters
Nicole is our office administrator. She is passionate about helping people heal from emotional and mental health traumas. She enjoys being the first person our clients talk to and works hard to make them feel comfortable, understood, and supported.
